Maha Bodhi | A Quest for Inner-Peace & Freedom
SHOW NOTES SUMMARY:
Were you born and raised in the land of the free and home of the brave, the United States of America?
This week’s episode reminds me that oppression and enslavement are not only in Yemen, where this week’s guest was born but also in the free world. It just looks different from what Maha experienced.
Ironically, Maha fled Yemen, where she experienced oppression, enslavement, arranged marriage twice that included violence and rape, and two civil wars in search of a better (more free) life in America. A life where she could purchase a dress for the first time and make everyday decisions for herself without her father’s dictatorship and abuse from her mother.
This episode begs the question: Where is freedom truly found; is it a state of mind? Or is it simply where your feet touch the ground?
It depends on who you ask. Holocaust survivor Viktor Frankl said: “It is not freedom from conditions, but it is the freedom to take a stand toward the conditions.”
Maha took a stand against her conditions. And we all have that power to do so, particularly within the confines of our minds.
Follow Maha’s journey from oppression to freedom when she became a U.S. citizen in 2018. Today, she truly is an unleashed heart, sharing her gifts, wisdom, and experience with all who are open to receiving her message.
There’s a story behind her name. Listen to learn the depth of her name and, more importantly, what it has meant to her as she’s reinvented herself as a free Maha.
The degree of your surrender is the degree of your success. – Maha Bodhi
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CONNECT WITH VICTORIA:
Victoria Volk 0:00
Thank you for tuning in to grieving voices. Today my guest is Mahabodhi. And after surviving a brutal upbringing of being enslaved as a female in Yemen, forced into an arranged marriage twice, surviving multiple death threatening situations, and two civil wars before arriving in the US, Maha found her freedom and true self through the practice of ancient Yogic and modern neuroplasticity techniques. She is a living example of the hero’s journey and is dedicating her entire life to spread the transformational texts techniques that have saved her life. Thank you so much for being Yoona.
Maha Bodhi 0:41
Thank you for having me, Victoria, thank you so much. It’s an honor to be here.
Victoria Volk 0:45
And I initially met, I had gone to a Women’s Business Summit, and you were one of the presenters. And you had shared your story, and I was just captivated by your story. And I thought, Gosh, I need to have her on the podcast. And here we are.
Maha Bodhi 1:00
Yes, here we are. Yes, thank you for having me. I, it was so just so refreshing to see you in that summit, and to see all the incredible women and the incredible work that that organization is doing, you know, I was just really impressed.
Victoria Volk 1:17
And so you tour the country, and go all over speaking and things like that. But that wasn’t always your life. And I imagine what shaped your life in the work that you’re doing today has been your life experience? And can you take us back in time?
Maha Bodhi 1:34
Absolutely. Like you mentioned Victoria, in your intro, I did come from a very kind of traumatic background, my both of my parents are from Yemen. And it’s a very poor and undeveloped country, you know, 50% of the population and lives below the line of poverty. You know, they don’t even most people don’t even have access to clean water or basic human necessities, any sort of appropriate health care. And women are treated very, very poorly in terms of their goal, the purpose of a female really in that country is to serve her husband and, and a man is allowed to have up to four wives. They call them like Sister Wives and they all live in the same house. And arranged marriage is very common in that region. And not only nemenhah Multiple Muslim countries, and even till this day, it’s still practice that arranged marriage were really the kind of your parents, mostly the father, it’s the male dominant culture, the father owns the daughter, and then potential husband will come and propose and it’s kind of like a business deal. They shake hands. And there’s a dowry involved a lot of money that the potential husband pays the father and then the father hands off the female, his daughter or to the new husband. In most cases, they don’t even ask the woman permission, if you call her consent, if she wants to marry this man, you know, they show her a photo and this is who you’re gonna marry, and they meet for the first time in their wedding night. And so a similar, you know, scenario happened to me not once, but twice. And it was very traumatic, you know, one of the husbands was very violent and tried to kill me. And because I came from a very unstable family I also there was abuse in my home. So we the whole country of Yemen is a very, there’s a lot of turmoil, there’s a lot of civil wars, there’s Tribal Wars, there’s international wars, there’s like five different wars going on at the same time. And, and in addition to that, there was violence inside of our home, my mother was extremely violent physically, verbally, you name it. And so I was used to violence and it was kind of my normal. And so when I married the especially the second husband, and I was forced into that marriage, and he was violent, and he was trying to kill me in a machine gun in my head and a sword in my throat and these like dramatic scenarios that you only see in you know, Hollywood movies. And for me, I you know, it wasn’t that extreme, because I was like, Okay, do I go back home and, you know, somebody’s gonna kill me there. Do I stay here and die here. So those were kind of were my options. So it was a very extreme, extreme situation. But in that moment, when you’re in it, it’s now that I look back now that I’m here and I’m safe, and I’ve healed and I’ve matured, I look back and it literally feels like it happened to somebody else that feels like a movie. What I went through and I don’t like the human spirit is just so incredible and so resilient and and I look at myself and like wow, how did I survive that you know, and, and still move on and still come here. And you know, it’s a long story. My father was a diplomat. So we there that was kind of my key my window to freedom because because of his job as a diplomat official, his job required him to travel and to move Every four years to a different country, so we would kind of go back and forth. I was born in Russia, and we lived in Rome in Italy. That was my upbringing. And we lived here in Washington, DC, and my father worked for the embassy there for four years. And so kind of had a taste of what life outside of Yemen looks like. And that’s why I kind of, I knew inside of me that there’s another way, there’s another way of living.
Maha Bodhi 5:26
And, you know, eventually my father had to retire, I went to school in Romania, and I decided to, he was supposed to retire. And the last station that he was as a deployment was in Bucharest, Romania, and I knew that this was, if I go back to Yemen for good, you know, I will die, either somebody will kill me or I will kill myself. And so I decided to start applying for graduate school here in the United States, I saw some of my Romanian classmates do that. And it was like, A ha, that’s my key to freedom. And I just started applying, and I got accepted. And, you know, it was truly nothing short of a miracle. That, you know, I had convinced my dad to let me go to come here and get my master’s degree in organizational behavior, you know, really used school as an excuse, and, and he was able to let me go, and I came here, and I knew, you know, the moment I landed, the moment I stepped on American soil, was the first time in my life that I was free that, you know, I didn’t have to answer to anybody, I didn’t have a curfew, and I was in my 20s. And as like, no one’s calling me, no one is looking over my shoulder, I can go wherever I want, I can wear whatever I want. And that’s kind of where my healing journey began.
Victoria Volk 6:43
Hard to believe that, that still happens, or is still happening to people to women. And I can’t imagine the person that you’ve become right like, how, what did that look like for you? What did that healing look like? And also, I’m also curious, how old were you when you were first? Sold for marriage? Like, what is the typical age?
Maha Bodhi 7:06
Yeah. So you know, I was 19 my first arranged marriage, but Truly Victorian, mentally, I would say I was 10 years old, because of the lack of education, the lack of exposure, the lack of maturity, there’s there was zero sexual education, I did not know what sex was or how it works, or what a man and a husband doing the bedroom. And so I literally was a child in my head, even though I was 19, I was so scared and terrified, all they told us, it’s gonna hurt a little bit, but then it’s gonna be okay. And eventually, you’re gonna love him, and you know, just have kids right away, and especially have a boy because that will increase your value. And literally, that was all the sex education that I got. And so I was terrified. And also, I’m with a stranger all of a sudden, and there’s a complete, like, segregation between the sexes, in that culture, men and women do not socialize whatsoever. You know, they cover up the woman from head to toe, and then all of a sudden, on your wedding day, here you go, this is your husband, you know, go and be intimate with Him. And it was it was just like, insane. And so that was that was that was a lot. And then it was two years apart between my first thing so literally, the first arrangement, I only saved 30 days, and I was playing hide and go seek with this man. For those 30 days, I was sleeping most of the nights in the bathroom floor locking myself, you know, because I did not want to have sex with him. And I never did. I just hid in the bathroom for 30 days. And then eventually I ran back to my parents house. And then they locked me up because now I brought shame to the family because that’s so taboo in that culture and, and I attained like the whole family reputation. And, and that was this. I was locked up for one year, and there was a negotiations of the divorce, they were trying to bully me back into the marriage. And I really was fierce, you know, now looking back, I was standing up to the most powerful men and a corrupt country, you know, that man that I married, his father was the prime minister of our country, and, you know, in that kind of corrupt environment, and I was saying no to those men, I’m like, I’m not going back. I don’t know where I had that ferocity from, and I and so they locked me up in my parents house, literally solitary confinement, and for one year, I could not even see my own sisters that lived in the same house with me. At one point, I remember I opened the door to go to the bathroom and I see my little sister. And last time I saw her she was crawling. She couldn’t even walk yet. And now she was like, bouncing around and walking. She’s grown and I didn’t even recognize her and we live in the same house. And so I was losing my mind and I was literally starting to hear voices in my head and And then after the divorce was finalized, it took a year, they forced me into an a second arranged marriage, like right into it. And at that point, I was so desperate that I thought, okay, maybe it’s better, you know, to get out of this, you know, jail that I’m in, and maybe maybe this guy will love me and be kind to me, and I’ll have a better life than I’m having right now. And so I was kind of optimistic about this one. And he ended up being extremely violent, he was the one with the machine guns and the swords and locking me up. And, and that was where sexual abuse came in. And he because I just tried to do the same thing that I did with my first husband and avoid, you know, sexual relations with him, and he wouldn’t have it. So he was forcing himself on me and was pretty much right. You know, even though we, you know, we were married, if you will, but I wasn’t, you know, I didn’t consent to this marriage. And then same thing, I stayed there, I stayed with him for 40 days, because, you know, I gave him 10 days more, because I was just so terrified of, you know, doing it twice. And but it really was death or life in the situation because of the, how violent he was. And I was like, you know, what, if I’m gonna die anyway, you know, just, I’m just gonna go back to my parents house and see what happens and, and that’s when my father, it’s interesting, I call this divine intervention, because my father was supposed to retire. He was at the end of his career traveling was over and we were in Yemen and, and all of a sudden, my dad gets one last final diplomatic mission to go on it to go to Romania in Bucharest, and, you know, be the ambassador of for our country in that in Romania. And my dad, just because the situation was out of control, my dad just grabbed me and he said, Come on, just I’m gonna go to Romania to come with me.
Maha Bodhi 11:52
And so that’s how I went to Romania. And I started going to college because I wasn’t doing anything. I wasn’t going to school. You know, I was just being bought and sold left and right. And locked up. And so I started going to school, I went to business school and things kind of slowly began to lighten up for me, I went to school. And then the final year when my father was this time, for real, he was supposed to retire. I applied for graduate school and came to the United States. And you asked me, what was this healing journey and you see me now, you know, doing the work that I do when touring the country, like you said, and I’m writing my memoir, and I’m leading yoga retreats, and I, you know, work with Fortune 105 100 corporations. It’s not overnight, you know, and I know our culture has this, like, quick fix this before and after picture. It’s not like that. It was a process. It was years and years of intense healing therapy, yoga, meditation, inward reflection, and a lot of self study. I came here you know, I had to figure out who is MMA outside of all that chaos. I never had a moment to know who I am. I never made one decision in my life up to that point I was 25 years old when I came to the United States and I never you know bought a dress or never, you know, get got to decide the you know where to go or what to eat. Or, you know, my bedroom. I remember we would like because we were traveling a lot like I can I choose my room like now you don’t get to choose your room. You don’t get to choose and everything is thought for you. Everything is decided for you. Even my hair cut even like the littlest thing, every decision was made for me. So here I am a grown women. Now I’m in the land of the free. Everything is supposed to be amazing, right? But no, because internally, I don’t know how to make the simplest decision. I don’t know how to process information. I don’t know how to behave like a grown woman. I remember I had to buy a mattress because right I just moved here. That’s the first thing you do you buy a mattress to sleep on. And I did not know how I’ve never had a bank account in my life. I did not know how to pay for the mattress. The cashier had to show me how to write a check. And he would tell me like paying the order right here, sign here, put the date here. And I was so proud of myself. When I did that. I thought I achieved something incredible. And I didn’t know how to put gas in my car, all these things. So I had to learn step by step by step and yoga played a big, big role in my healing. And it really changed my life. And that’s why now I’m so passionate about helping other people and sharing the techniques that helped me because they work if it worked for me, literally coming from under a rock. English is not even my first language. And now I’m doing what I do. I think anybody can do it. If you have Well, if you have the determination, and you put in the work, it is possible.
Victoria Volk 15:07
Wow, it was like you were a 25 year old infant, I’m sure. It felt like ways Yes. And really vulnerable to being manipulated and taken advantage of again. And so did you. Like where? How did you even know where to find support? As when you first came here? Like, how, what did that look like?
Maha Bodhi 15:29
You know, I was so excited. And so I fell in love with America and American culture. And because of when we were traveling with my father, one of our stops was in the United States was in Washington, DC. And we lived there for four years. And I started kindergarten there, and I studied up to third grade. And me and my sister was me and my older sister, were kinda like two years apart, we got hooked. It was our favorite country of all the countries that we lived in. And we just fell in love with America. And then when we had to move away, because, you know, my dad continued to travel, we were heartbroken. And we never got over it. It was like falling in love, and you never get over it. And so we would move to other countries. And we would watch, you know, American sitcom Saved by the Bell, full house, all these things. We were so immersed in American culture, and so kind of resisting. You know, we were in Saudi Arabia, and we were resisting that culture. Were like, no, America is like so much better. And so we always were dreaming of like, America was the dream. And so when I came here, it was literally like, I remember I called my sister, I just landed. And I was in San Francisco, and I called her I’m like, I’m in San Francisco. And she’s like, whoa, you did it. And she’s like, just live the dream live the dream for both of us, because she got arranged marriage, you know, and into that, you know, path and she already had two kids and, and so she was like, you know, just do it, do it for the both of us. And so what motivated me when you said, like, how did you feel I was so excited. I was literally living my dream. And I was like, I’m here. And anything is possible here. You know, all those restrictions and chains that I had, were gone. And I realized, now it’s up to me. Now, it’s, you know, me and me. All the excuses that I had are gone. So it’s up to me what I do with this freedom, what I do with this opportunity, and so I just, you know, saw, you know, therapy. That was number one, I would say number one was therapy. I knew I needed healing, I would have terror nightmares. You know, I suffered dramatically from PTSD. I mean, I didn’t even know I had PTSD, I would just have these nightmares. And so I went to therapy. And and it went from there. You know, therapy really, really helped me break down how your past, you know, is still showing up in your future and kind of shapes the lens of how you view your world and your life. Right. Dr. Gabor Mate said it. He’s an incredible physician and therapist in his holistic his work is incredible. But he says,
Maha Bodhi 18:04
Your mind shapes your world. But before that your world shaped your mind. And so that’s why you know, I talk a lot about manifestation and manifesting your best life and my work, but unable to tap into your innate power of manifestation become the creator of your life experience, you have to undo you have to unlearn you have to heal. What was done to you, especially if it was a negative thing, the old tape, the old limiting belief, all my life, I was told that I was unworthy, my mom would literally step on me, I’m like, in a fetal position when I was young, and she would put her foot on my back and tell me like, you are worthless, you are nothing, you know, and I’m being like, I’m not I’m trying not to be BullGuard, they’re on your podcast, but she would say a lot of more aggressive things than just that. And so those things shape your mind. And I carry that with me all my life that I am worthless, like, who’s gonna want to look at me who’s gonna want to hear me who’s gonna want to be my friend who’s going to give me a job, all these things, I carry those with me. And then they impact all the other, you know, areas of development in your life, your career, your finances, your relationships. And so therapy helped me kind of see that. But I felt like I plateaued. I reached a point where I just felt like I wasn’t progressing at the rate that I wanted to. And that’s when yoga kicked in, because I love therapy so much, but you’re only dealing with the intellect part of us. And there’s a whole other part that is the body that is not tapped into therapy, unless it’s a Holistic Therapist. But that’s where yoga really came in. What does it feel like to feel safe in your body? How does it feel in your belly? How does it feel in your heart? How does it feel in your legs? eggs. And so those things to embody to be in body to feel the qualities that you want to cultivate. And the beautiful news is that, you know, it’s possible you can cultivate those qualities just through your intentions. And being mindful. The brain is malleable, the brain is plastic, it’s a muscle just like any other muscle. And we know now through research through neuroplasticity, a lot of studies have been done in Harvard, at the Lazar lab, the impact and benefits of yoga and meditation and what it does to the physical structure of the brain, they take the brain and they scan it before and they scan it after, you know, an intensive yoga and meditation program. And they saw that you increase gray matter through these modalities and through these practices. And what does that mean, what is gray matter mean? You know, I’m a little nerdy, and I don’t want to confuse people. All that means is that you activate parts of the brain that correspond to hope, optimism, joy, and you just start to make different decisions, and you start to have a different view of life.
Victoria Volk 21:10
So much came up for me as I was listening to you and I, my eyes started to well up when you were talking about what you said, your sister had shared with you. And I just thought, oh my gosh, like you’re not only in a foreign country, or you were familiar with America, but you left your family, your grind everything behind that you knew solar’s I have a two part question. If you don’t mind going there. But did you ever think about changing your name? is Maha Bodhi your birth name, first of all? And then secondly, are you still in relationship with your family?
Maha Bodhi 21:46
I’m glad you asked that question, because a lot of people asked me that question. So my first name Ma is my given name. It’s a very common name in Middle Eastern countries and Arabic speaking countries. And it was, it means in Arabic, it translates into big, beautiful eyes. And that’s why my parents named me Maha. And so when I came fast forward to the United States, and I’m actually in my yoga teacher training, and it’s my first day of teacher training. And the teacher asked me, Can you introduce yourself to the group and I said, Hi, my name is Maha. And he said, Do you want to tell them what Maha means? And I said, Oh, it means the beautiful eyes. He’s like, yes, but in Sanskrit, it means the great. And I had no idea Victoria, that it meant that in Sanskrit, or it had a meaning in Sanskrit. And everybody looked at me, and they were like, Whoa, you were destined to be a yogi. And you know, it’s like Mahatma Gandhi or Maha Yoga, it’s a means the great. And so that was kind of one of those, you know, universal signs that I like, I feel like the universe gives us clues clues, clues like this is to nudge us in the right direction. And so that was the first thing. My last name was my family name, which is I’ll call it D. And I did change it when I became a US citizen. And so I became a US citizen in 2018. And I didn’t have any intention to change my name. And I was getting naturalized. And my immigration lawyer, she told me, I was filling up the form. And she said, click here, do you want to change your name, and I said, Oh, and she said, This is the easiest way to do it. Like the fastest and easiest way, just check that box and write whatever name you want. And I was like, I actually do want to change my last name, because I felt like I was a completely different person. I had just completed my yoga teacher training. And I became this Yogi and I, and you know, when you when, when you are expecting a baby, you have like nine months to figure out what you want your baby’s name to be, or some people even know that beforehand. They really thought it through. They did research. And I didn’t have time and it was like that moment. And I just like came to me just Bodi came to me. And Bodie means the enlightened ones. It’s the Bodhi tree where the Buddha sat under the tree and he became awakened. And I felt like I was at that moment, I was going through these journeys, and I was having these awakening experiences that were so so powerful, and I would share them with with my colleagues during Teacher Training. I like did you feel that did you and they’re like, What are you talking about? We didn’t feel any of these things that you’re talking about. And so I felt like I was having a unique experience. And so I literally just wrote down. Bodie, not honest, I like I said, I didn’t have a lot of time to think about it. And now so then my friend told me, she’s like, Oh, so now you are the great enlightened one. I’m like, Oh, my God. No, like that’s That sounds very egotistical. I don’t see myself that way. You know, I’m just a human and progress like everybody else. But you know, I think it called me the name kind of called me.
Victoria Volk 24:58
I’d actually looked your name up before Are ya Business Summit? Yeah, cuz I was curious of the, I figured there was some sort of meaning behind. Yeah. The other part of my question too was, Are you still in communication with your family?
Maha Bodhi 25:12
You know, unfortunately, no, I had to sacrifice that relationship and able to move forward in my life. It was very difficult. I slowly be transformed. You know, I call, I call myself there was Yemen Maha. And then there was American Maha, and then there was yo Hema. And the transitions were very extreme. And it was difficult for me, I would talk to my parents initially when I first moved to the United States, and I would call them and I would talk to my sisters and talk. And what I realized is that every time I spoke to them, I have to pretend that I’m still that old MA for them. And I had to really hide who I am. And it was painful. It felt like self betrayal. And, you know, also, it was reminding me of, you know, the past traumas. And I was on this healing journey. And so I realized that if I really, really want to heal and become my fullest expression of my fullest potential, that there’s a sacrifice that needs to be made. And I did. And it wasn’t easy, but I believe that it was it had it was necessary.
Victoria Volk 26:23
And that’s a part of grief that a lot of people resist is creating those boundaries. And yes, really being able to have the, to feel empowered enough to say, No, I need to walk away from this relationship. It’s not serving me.
Maha Bodhi 26:42
Yeah, absolutely. Wow.
Victoria Volk 26:45
So tell us about the work that you’re doing now. And your mission?
Maha Bodhi 26:51
Yeah, you know, when I came here, I just wanted to be an American, just like everybody else. So I’m like, Okay, what do Americans do Americans get a job and, you know, work in corporate America. And so that’s exactly what I did. And I just got a, you know, I studied, I got my master’s degree in organizational behavior. And after I graduated, I found a job. I worked in the headquarters here in Los Angeles for DirecTV. And I worked as a leadership development trainer and coach and I was delivering, like classroom style trainings. And I liked it, you know, I didn’t mind it. So I just, I kept going, and I kept doing what I was doing. But yoga was always my happy place. So I realized, like, after work, you know, I was still copying whatever American culture was doing. So after work, everybody goes to happy hour, everybody. And I liked that for a little bit. But then I realized that you know what, I’d actually rather go to yoga. After work. Instead of that happy hour, I feel better, I sleep better, I wake up better. And so yoga was always my happy place. And then I just kept going for years and years, until one day, I decided just to take it to the next level. And I was like, You know what, I’m gonna go to a yoga teacher training. And I signed up, and I thought it was gonna be a hobby. I thought I was going to teach a yoga class at the park on a Sunday. That was really my intention. But then the first day, Victoria promised to the first I stepped into that room, I knew I knew that I was in the right place, that I belonged, and that my life was going to change. And for the first time in my life, I felt understood, I felt that this is a language that I speak. And I just knew that this was what I was meant to do and who I was meant to be. I was never good at school. And I struggled a lot with, you know, academia. And when I was in yoga teacher training, I was the smartest girl in the training. And I never and it was so refreshing and surprising at the same time. Like when a teacher asks a question, I’m the one raising my hand, you know, I always say like, Monica from my friends, like, I know, I know. I’m, like, I’m that annoying student. And I never was that student, I started to realize that the other trainees were coming to me for advice, and were telling me oh, you’re the best one only you can do this, can you please teach me and it felt like I have something to offer the world I have value, like for the first time in my life, and it was very rewarding that I have something I can be of service to others, and I can help make a difference. And and I never looked back. And you know, I would I will say that I probably wouldn’t have the courage to completely quit my job and just become a yoga teacher. But what happened was, that’s another clue from the universe that I got certified. mid December, it was December 17. And then January 1, like two weeks later, I got certified I got my yoga teacher certification. And then two weeks later, I got a notice from my company that I’m being laid off. And the whole team is being laid off, not just me. They lay off a lot of people it’s part of their downside was a process. And it was just our time, you know? And everybody was crying for my team, what am I going to do? Oh my God, my job, you know, they have mortgages, they have an I was relieved and I knew I was like, I see you universe, I see what’s happening here, I know that you’re telling me to go this way. And I never shed a tear. I never was upset, I felt so light.
Maha Bodhi 30:24
And you know, they give you a severance and they I’m like, I I’m like, All right, I just took that severance. And I ran and I never looked back. And I started building my yoga business and building my work and, and it just unfolded. You know, I just started just teaching yoga and yoga studio in a classroom. And then because I had a huge corporate network, you know, for my corporate life, my friends were uh, what is this yoga you speak of? Like, what are you teaching? Can you come into our company and maybe talk about it and, and share it. And as you know, my my background, being the leadership development, training, trainer and holding, you know, that classroom type of training. So I kind of bridge those two worlds together. And I created my own formula, which is, you know, just from different schools of thought. So I combined the ancient wisdom, healing yogic techniques, with the corporate, you know, cutting edge best practices and efficiency and agility. With the science of neuroplasticity, I created my own formula, I call it the high performance mind. And now I you know, I go to corporations, and I deliver trainings, I do one on one coaching, and I do inspirational, speaking engagements, where you saw me at the Women Business Summit, where I just talk about my background, and my experience. So that’s kind of how it’s shaped. And it’s, you know, from from trauma from a very intense, you know, difficult situation. So that’s why I always say, you know, these traumatic experiences, they can break you down, or they can break you open. And it’s really up to you. It’s your decision, what you make of it, the poet Rumi said, The wound is where the light enters you. And so are you going to open to the learning, instead of slipping into victim and being Why did this happen to me, you know, which one is better, like, think about it for a moment?
Victoria Volk 32:16
Well, and you might be there for a time, and it’s exactly what you’re, you’re gonna sit with all of that and the overwhelm of it all, but not to stay there. And, you know, just wake up and just choose better for yourself.
Maha Bodhi 32:29
It’s just what you touched upon what we call in yoga, a spiritual bypass, we don’t want to bypass that trauma or that difficult experience, you actually want to hold space for it and be a container. So you’re not dismissing that pain or dismissing that part of you, that’s when we create disconnect, you actually want to integrate all parts of you that it all belongs the wounded part of you, and the and the the inner child, part of you, you know, and even the parts of you that you don’t really like, you know, maybe it’s anger or jealousy, or you know, that part of you also belong, and the loving part of you and the light part of you all of it. And once you become whole, and that’s really when you tap into your full power and you’re able to live your whole life.
Victoria Volk 33:15
Do you seem to draw people to your work that have experienced trauma? And is that a big part of your yoga practice today? Like, do you work one on one with a lot of trauma?
Maha Bodhi 33:27
You know, it’s interesting, I’m not a therapist. So I don’t think it’s my place to do that. But I do notice that people gravitate towards me that not just people who went through trauma, anybody who wants to reach their fullest potential and highest expression, you know, the dreamers, you know, the rebels, the people who want to follow the path of least resistance, which I call like, go with the flow, you want to be in alignment with yourself, you want what you feel is in aligned with what you say, and what you do show up as your best self. And so those are the kinds of people you’d like I said, I’m not a therapist, even though I understand trauma very well. And I see I can see it very clearly in people but I don’t have the skill set to walk somebody through it in depth, they probably will be better served by seeking a professional.
Victoria Volk 34:14
I know that you you did a piece in an HBO documentary, do you want to speak to that a little bit?
Maha Bodhi 34:15
You know, that was kind of part of it’s still in production. It’s not out there yet. But what happened is that I did one of my inspirational speaking engagements in Beverly Hills and they there was a lot of media there and you know, production companies follow me and there are females on there called CTV and they reached out to me and they said, We want to film your story and they’re doing the HBO documentary, which is every episode is focused on one story, and they came to me and we filmed it and I don’t know where it is right now. It’s kind of still in production.
Victoria Volk 34:54
Well, if it comes out before you know the your episode actually airs. I’ll put that in the show. Let’s but yeah, please keep me up to date on that. Yeah, great. And what’s next for you.
Maha Bodhi 35:04
You know, I’m just, you know, I’m continuing to evolve and grow. In my work, I’m leading international yoga retreats, which are tremendously transformational, because you kind of step away from the noise of your day to day life. And you know, a retreat is to retreat within. And so we are away from all of that, and you’re in a new environment, and we do yoga twice a day. And I really have seen people transform in front of my eyes. And it’s truly magical, if you if you’re willing and open to allow healing to occur to allow transformation to occur. And I always say like, the more you’re willing to surrender, the degree of your surrender is equal to the degree of your success. And so the more you resist, you know, the more you get stuck, you know, emotions are energy in motion, right? They’re designed to come pass through and let go. And it’s when we hold on, it’s when we resist. And when we grip, and we become identified by that story in that pain, that’s when we get stuck. And really yoga is Mo moving your body, you’re literally expanding your body or stretching yourself. Because when you are in pain, you contract the body, right, you physically contract the body, you can see it, you make a fist with your head, you close your ribs, you’re fidgeting, you’re tensing the body, so the energy is not able to flow freely in the body. And yoga is kind of a counter for that. So you’re stretching your body, you’re breathing through the practice. And so you’re kind of releasing that energy. Now the breath is flowing in your body, now the blood is flowing in your body. When you’re doing that downward facing dog, your head is lower than your heart. So you’re kind of reversing the blood flow, the effects of gravity. And what happens is literally you’re optimizing all the systems in the body, you’re optimizing your nervous system, you’re optimizing the blood flow, the bread we talked about in the brain, the heart, all these things. And then when you’re in that state of expansion, you liberated that energy because it takes so much energy to kind of be caught up in your stress and in your pain and in your story. And when you freed up that energy, literally, I talked about embodying and now you’re embodying freedom in your in your body, you can do so much with that liberated energy and use it in a very useful way that benefits you and really benefits everyone around you in the greatest good.
Victoria Volk 37:35
Love. Do you offer online classes?
Maha Bodhi 37:39
I do Insight Timer on Sundays. That’s a year Neoga de stress and deep stretch. That’s the That’s my online class. And I do the high performance mind, you know that my my leadership trainings, I do that with corporations, but I also offer free master classes on a monthly basis. So every month we meet, and I give them kind of like a snippet of the highperformance mind masterclass. It’s all on yogimaha.com.
Victoria Volk 38:05
Okay, I will put that link in the show notes too. But I kind of want to dip back into the serious stuff a little bit again. I’m curious because of your experience with the traumatic experience that you had with marriage and being in that environment of arranged marriage. And so how has that shaped and I know that you’re a completely different person now than you were then. And so I think sometimes what happens is, well, what I’ve seen even for me personally, and people I’ve worked with and through grief, once you have dealt with all that emotional stuff and the trauma, you are changed by it right for the positive and you seem to then attract more of the same to you. Yeah. And so how has because I imagine if I would have experienced something like that, I would have been very cynical about love, right? Like, so how has that shaped you today? And how you know, and love and marriage.
Maha Bodhi 39:04
It does shape and I just want to say that when you heal, it’s not that that is completely gone. It’s not like that it’s disappeared. It’s just that you learn how to like we said hold space for it. So it’s not kind of blurring your vision. It’s not dominating your decision mechanism. So it’s not leading the way so you kind of see it you observe it, it’s there. I see you I know you’re still there. But but it’s okay. Kind of like a little child but it’s okay, we got this we can do this together. So I think that’s what’s healing. It’s that integration, that sense of wholeness. I did struggle a lot with relationships, you know, I’m not gonna lie to Victoria. I struggled a lot with intimacy, love and relationships, especially when it comes to dating. There is this kind of like fear but, you know, I think if you have to choose between love and fear, I think when in doubt, always choose love and always open up to love you can Can’t go wrong with love.
Victoria Volk 40:01
There’s the show, I’ve been kind of watching just like my secret indulgence, if you will, you know, it’s like this not trashy TV, but reality TV. But it’s called Love is blind, and I just find the, the, it’s an experiment in love, but you, you don’t meet the people, you just talk. And you build this emotional connection before you ever see them. And it really highlights how superficial of a society we really are, when we’re looking at appearances. And you can’t you don’t make a decision on love based on on, you know, race or background or any of those things. It’s just purely an emotional connection. And so can you speak to that for someone who may be struggling to build that emotional connection with someone? That’s a good lead to, by the way?
Maha Bodhi 40:59
That’s a very interesting question. You know, it’s kind of what you mentioned, this show that they kind of connect on an emotional level before they see each other before on a physical level, which is kind of like the opposite of what’s happening with dating apps these days, dating apps is purely based on looks purely based on that snippet like swipe, swipe, swipe super fast make that decision, I do think that I personally am that kind of person. With the advice that I can, I’m the kind of person that I would like to connect more like, I’d like to know someone more, it’s easier to open up. Because if you have these trust issues, like that’s what I struggled with, it’s when you have that background, like similar to me, what happens is that you don’t trust people, because the people that were supposed to love you unconditionally violated that trust. And then as you grow as an adult, it’s really difficult for you to, to find that trust again. Especially, you know, with a complete stranger, you know, if my parents didn’t love me and take care of me, how is a stranger gonna love me and take care of me. So I better watch out, right? That’s the mindset for me, if that’s something you’re struggling with, probably the dating apps are not going to be beneficial to you, I would say friendships, you probably want to lean into it through a friendship through somebody, you know, doing what you love. So when you do what you love, and you follow your bliss, like Joseph Campbell said, you’re gonna put yourself in situations to be surrounded with like minded people, and you’re going to attract like minded people. And so you’re going to meet those people. And it could start off as no colleagues or you know, friendship, like I said, and you start to have conversation, I feel that creates a safe environment, to open up to somebody and be more trustful. And I know that’s a slower pace than, you know what our society teaches us the swipe, swipe, swipe, but I think it’s a very healthy way. And it’s also more authentic, and it’s probably going to be a more lasting relationship. You know, when I started I, I was working right in the corporate world, and I wanted and I just decided to be a yogi and I just made this huge transformation that literally my friends were worried about me, they were, you know, they were doing interventions like what are you, okay, like, who leaves their corporate job with all the benefits and the big salaries in the fancy offices, and you know, and health insurance and all that stuff, and then you just go live on a yoga teacher salary, and they thought I was crazy, right? They were worried about me, are you okay? Literally, I would get text message, are you okay? And that was a little bit isolating for me, you know, I felt like no one understood me. But when you chew, and it takes a lot of willpower, because the calling was so big for me, like my North Star was so big that the obstacles were small in comparison to the North Star. And so I followed through my passion. And, you know, I started to share it with the world and I start to use my voice and speak up, even though it was a big risks. You know, everybody’s telling me, I’m crazy. And I’m going out there and sharing it with the world. What happened is that people that are like me, started to see themselves in me and started to rally around me. And so that’s called community. So I started to build community. And I started to be surrounded by like minded people, just because I decided to do what I love. And I followed my calling. So the goal was not to meet people. The goal was not to create community. I just felt this calling and I followed my bliss. And then that cascade leads to other things, that leads so that’s kind of my advice to people is just do what you love and the right people will find you
Victoria Volk 44:41
Follow what lights you up. Right? Exactly. Well, that’s a great tip that takes care of that one question I was going through all of this, what is your grief taught you?
Maha Bodhi 44:51
You know, I like I said, my parents are still alive. But what I had to learn is I had to learn on how to support myself, I had to learn how to self regulate. And what you know, that’s me. And then literally, I had when you have nowhere to go, you go inside, that’s what happened to me like my when your face is like in the wall, there was nowhere to go but inside. And so I went inside, and I did the self work. And I did the self study, which allowed me to learn how to be my own best friend, and be my parent that I never had, and be my greatest coach and be my best friend, and be my greatest lover. So I was able to be all these things. And it’s not an easy journey. But it is such a powerful journey, the results are truly incredible. And so that’s when you become whole. And that wholeness allowed me to be a better friend for other people, a better lover for another person. And so now I have because my cup is so full, I’m able to give from my overflow, when your cup is empty, you’re no good for anybody around you. And so now I’m able to be compassionate, really, and see people when they’re suffering and just hold space for them, and not try to fix it really, I try not to slip into preacher or teacher mode or try to, you know, I’ll show you how to fix this, you know, just by holding space for somebody, people want to be seen people want to be heard. People want to be valued. And so I would say that’s what it taught me. And I think that’s a very powerful capability to have.
Victoria Volk 46:41
Absolutely agree. What gives you the most joy and hope for the future for your future.
Maha Bodhi 46:46
I feel I’m on the right path, I feel I’m on the right place and at the right time. And I feel the more I do this work, the stronger my relationship with my gut feeling is. And so sometimes it doesn’t make sense the decisions that I make, like from an external perspective, from an intellectual perspective, which our culture is very intellectual, and I know that my gut will never lie to me. And so I feel very optimistic because I see that relationship continues to grow and grow. And I trust it more. So I’m really looking forward to the future.
Victoria Volk 47:20
And I think that happens as we start to dig away and just clear away all of that stuff. We win
Maha Bodhi 47:28
The noise and the stories. Yeah,
Victoria Volk 47:31
A lot easier to tap into our intuition when we are able to do that. I think
Maha Bodhi 47:36
I’m writing my memoir, like I mentioned, and that’s been such a cathartic experience for me. And I’m really excited to share that with the world. Do you have a launch date? Yeah, no, I think by end of this year, okay. Yes.
Victoria Volk 47:50
I’m really excited about that for that. Yeah. Is there anything else that you would like to share?
Maha Bodhi 47:55
I don’t, I want to say to people, don’t give away your power, you are so much more powerful than you think you are. And if you don’t believe me, just sit quietly and listen, listen to the voice that is inside of you. And, you know, I’m a meditation teacher, and a yoga teacher and all these tools and techniques. They’re all just designed to quiet down the noise in your head. So you’re able to see things clearly to hear things clearly. And that alone is such a powerful technique. You know, Victoria, I just saw this documentary. It’s an old documentary, there’s this experiment in a prison in Atlanta or Alabama, I’m sorry, one of those. It’s a prison. It’s a maximum security prison. And it’s like the most the worst prison in the United States. And they started to deliver Vipassana meditation, which is a silent 10 day meditation. It’s it’s the most intense program that anyone can go through to be silent for 10 days. And they did it in Alabama. And you know, it’s a it was a very Christian place, and there was a lot of resistance. But, you know, somehow, you know, they rolled out the program. And these prisoners are murderers are the worst kind of people you can imagine did horrific things. And they did this 10 day meditation of being silent and completely transformed. Like you can see their faces light up, you see them talk before how angry they were. And then there’s just like this pure peace in their face, just because they were able to quiet their head and drop into the body and identify the sensations of the body that are invoking this kind of reaction, this reactive place. And so they just learned how to be in their body and how to manage their body and manage their reaction and realize that it’s just a chemical reaction and I have the power. You know, I own my body. My body doesn’t own me. I own my brain. My brain does An own mean, I own my emotions. My emotions don’t own me. So that’s a very empowering tool. And your listeners are no, they’re not murderers, they’re not you know, so their journey can be so much easier and they don’t even need to do a 10 day silent meditation. Just sit quietly five minutes a day, 10 minutes a day journal, reflect, go inside self study, the more you get to know yourself, the better you’re able to serve yourself and serve other people.
Victoria Volk 50:28
Yeah. Kristin Sherry has said she’s one of my mentors. She said, the more you know yourself, the more the less you look to others to tell you who you are.
Maha Bodhi 50:37
Exactly. The less validation you need from others.
Victoria Volk 50:41
Yeah, I’m going to try and find that documentary you’re talking about and
Maha Bodhi 50:45
it’s on YouTube yet. Okay, too. Yeah.
Victoria Volk 50:49
I’ll have to look that up. Thank you so much for sharing your story, which is incredible. We truly live in a very blessed country. And it we are so lucky that I take it so for granted. Yeah, sure. Yes. Thank you so much again, and you’re welcome idea. And remember, when you unleash your heart you unleash your life. Much love.